i want a smartcar, but it seems as of this day, no one is giving me one.
i know mommybloggers are the hot snot right now, but what about those of us whose children are grown and not a criminal? nothing exciting happens. no one cares that he's 26, has a wife, a job, a mortgage and 2 kids. he's as boring as i am.
i need a baby. i could write about my beautiful glowing pregnancy. i could tweet during labor. i could post cutesy videoes and pictures of my baby making the gas-passing smile. i could post pictures with cute captions, so it would appear my child is doing the news and making snappy commentary. yep, a baby, that's my ticket to fame and fortune.
but somehow, if i were able to conceive at the age of 45 after 25 years of infertility, it would take a miracle of science. if i want this:
"i wub ooo, mama!"
"mom-may, somethin' stanks up in this joint!
my bad! grab me a fresh pamper!
warm up the butt wipes this time, woman!
hey, pop me out a boob while you're up!"
and besides, my imaginary baby seat wouldn't fit in my imaginary smartcar.
Well..you can conceive at 45, it's called egg donation. I did it. I have a child who's going on 9. 45 isn't too old to have a child. And yes babies do fit into smart cars:)
ReplyDeleteSame here, kind of - my kids are teens and asked me specifically never to write about them, which I totally get, because if I were them and they were me (so to speak) I'd be the same way.
ReplyDeleteAnd I love your writing - you are smart and funny and do not need a gimmick at all :)
jwoap, i have two instant grandbabies my son got when he married their mother. i am glad now god didn't give me a baby, i can't imagine a baby in the middle of those two!
ReplyDeletelidian, thanks for the kind words. i think i love the virtual dime museum more than kitchen retro.
ReplyDelete