Wednesday, February 26, 2014

My Ass On A Platter...

I had my ass handed back to on FB today, by someone I considered to be one of my best friends. We go to church together and have known each other even longer outside of church.

She had major surgery in the last week, so I'm trying to give her a break. It's probably the drugs.

I post things on my FB wall that may be posted for me, or for others sometimes. I share things that appeal to me. I don't post dirty jokes or racist comments.

But I got called out for posting Buddha quotes by my friend. She  asked by I was posting all "this buda stuff", that it went against everything she believed as a Christian. To her, he is just a fat Chinese idol.

I replied that Buddha never claimed to be a holy man, that she could consider Buddha quotes a recipe for a calmer life. As far as the fat idol quote, she should just consider him an Oriental Santa Claus who comes every day to bring you peace. I apologized for offending her.

She came back with I could never offend her, that I was her dear friend. Again, the drugs speak!

It made me cry. Not because of what she said, but because she called me out on FB. She knows me well enough to know that it is the worst thing she could do, to chastise me in a public forum. I still can't believe she did it.

I guess I can blame it on the drugs. Or maybe the drugs made her bold enough to remove the filter she previously had in place.

Or maybe sometimes you find out who your real friends are.

Friday, February 14, 2014

Friday Night Fun

I have the overwhelming urge to go to Target. Yeah, on Valentine's Day. My husband went to bed early and I am bored. I am watching "The Hangover" which I have never seen.

But then I remembered that Valentine's junk will be on sale tomorrow, so I guess I will wait.

I think I will treat myself to a glass of wine and some chocolate-covered strawberries.

I do love myself.

My Worst Valentine's Day Ever...

It was 10th grade. I had been talking to a guy on the phone for 2 weeks and he asked me out for VD.

Bad idea...never have your first date on Valentine's Day!

He looked nothing like he'd described. He was supposed to be about ' tall. He was maybe 5'3" plus a good 3 inches in his high-heeled cowboy boots. He looked like Howdy Doody.

We were supposed to double date with another couple. He picked me up at my house with the other couple. When we got to the drive-in, there were 2 entire rows of people from their school. People kept popping in and out of the truck to see who Howdy-Doody has tricked into going out with him. He went to the concession stand. He stayed away.

The couple in the front had sex in front of me, then got in an argument. The girl walked off. The guy in the front suggested I get up front and we put the little heater between us. I agreed, as I was freezing.

I had been up there long enough I had some feeling back in my hands and feet. Then the girl he had screwed opened the door and yanked me out, accusing me of making out with him. There was a huge group of kids watching us. She kept calling me names like "slut"", "whore", "bitch" and punching me.

Something came over me when she kidda slugged me in the chest. I gave her a right punch in the mouth and knocked her over. Then I sat on her chest and started beating her in the face with my fists. Her friends pulled me off and I just walked away, across the parking lot and out the gates. I called for a ride home from a friend I knew would be getting off work.

I got a call from Howdy Doody, apologizing for everything. But I told him to shove it. He actually wanted another date! He was surprised I had stood up to the bitch. He wanted to get to know me. Well, he'd seen all he was going to see of me.

The parents of the girl I beat made her call and apologize. They offered to pay for any damages I might have incurred. I declined. I guess she didn't let them know I kicked her ass. Later, Howdy and his friends brought an envelope to the house with $100 bill in it. I had my sister go to the door. I put the money in the bank. i forgot about the incident.

About 5 years later, I ran into Howdy. He was at a bar, waiting on a date I guess, because he was alone and kept looking toward the door. I was there with my husband. i looked pimping. He waved at me. I ignored him.

I still haven't seen the movie that was playing at the drive-in...MY BLOODY VALENTINE!

Monday, February 10, 2014

...just like a man

This is so confounded confusing, it is giving me a headache.

My husband had a doctor's appointment for Feb. 20, so I made my next dental appointment for Feb. 21.

Then I was asked to change it to Feb.20 but later in the afternoon. That worked since his was 10:00 in the morning.

Then he mentioned he DID have another appointment with a different doctor for Feb. 21, which he had cancelled since I had made my dental appointment for the same day.

So he pouted all week-end. And he fussed. And he made me want to pinch him in the gut!

So after all this, he calls today and he is able to get his appointment back, as well as change the one he had for the week after so he can do both appointments at the same time. That gives me time to drop off our medical expenses at the social services office and still have time to go thrifting.

Or I may mail our expenses and go get lemon gelato. Yes, lemon gelato in the sticks of Mississippi.Its worth a stamp.

Saturday, February 1, 2014 I need a hole in my head...

Okay, things are okay. I can pay my house note, bills, groceries, gas and car insurance and usually have enough left for a cheap dinner out (usually via Groupon).

A friend sent me a late Christmas gift. Keep in mind I sent him a pointed crystal pendant and a ball chain to wear it on. He had mentioned he wanted one and I found a nice small double terminated quartz set in silver and a stainless steel call chain. He didn't want a big one because he wants to wear it at work and he wanted a small one so it would be discreet. He loved it. He said my gift was coming. I told him just catch me next year. But I got a huge heavy box from him in the mail the other day.

A brand new Bose radio with an iPhone dock. According to the Bose website, about $600 worth of radio. I'm being ungrateful but it has too much bass. I always cranked my treble up all the way. You can't adjust a Bose.

I get him a $5 necklace and he gets me a $600 radio.

It makes me feel like shit. He got the necklace before he got the radio though, so it's not like it is a surprise. I know he got a great job this year and he;s making a lot more money. I think he may have gotten the radio as a sales prize or something. If I keep telling myself that, I might feel better.

But do I really need a $600 radio?