Saturday, June 30, 2012

judge not, says the judge


i went to the women's retreat. it was okay. the food was great. i plan to put up a link to the facility later because i am  not really conscious at this point. i came home about 5 o'clock, sat up for an hour with bobo. but then he started watching racing and i fell asleep- ouch!my neck is all crunchy and my lungs hurt a bit. but there is a bad air warning out for this area and i was outside more than i expected. i told bobo he needs to wake me and be sure i am awake. shake me, pull my hair, pinch my toe. get me up though! because i will lie to  sleep. i will say anything to get me some extra sleep.

so now i am up very late. but i am tired and i will be dragging my sorry butt to church tomorrow all tired. i think my most favoritist thing about week-end is that i met a woman who was rocking the total kate gosselin. the hair do, cut clothes, makeup, jeweled flip-flips and florescent pink toe nail polih. the pineapple reverse mullet hair-do, complete with highlights and the super spiked part at the crown. we ended up together in line for an activity and we talked a bit. she was really nice, but i could feel the side of my face grow a zit. she exuded this weird energy and i decided to pretend she really was kate gosselin.that made dealing with her perkiness. fun memories of watching jon & kate + 8 before they went all nuts.

now i am eating my facorite pic-nic dinner while i play on the puter- v-8 juice, cheese and pretzels. this is my go to comfort food. i used to use it as a work lunch but flesh it out with some sliced turkey or ham and some vegetables- cherry tomatoes, cucumber slices, carrot sticks, pepper strips and maybe a boiled egg. i love it, i would love to force rachael ray to improve on it.i dare her. because she can't. it came about because i was broke and hungry one time when i was a teen and it was all i had in the house, sitting at home in the huge apartment my mother rented in order to get her welfare and food stamps (because she lived with her boyfriend but took advantage of the free section 8 apartment in the swanky apartment complex. that apartment was huge because they gave me and my sister each got our own room ( even though my sister lived with my great-grandmother). my mom kept her stuff in the master suite and i think the utility bill got paid through some energy grant my mother got. those were the days after she had ovarian cancer treatment.i remember going into fred montesi's supermarket at poplar and mendenall and getting fussed at by a little jewish lady.

"you're too young to be on the government dole, girlie." she snipped at me.

i had one of those episodes of self-realization where you feel yourself lift up and look down on the situation and look down. "my mother has cancer and my father is gone. it is all i do to eat." i told, feeling a bit like the little poor match girl.

the woman got all teary and apologized. she ended up cramming a twenty in my hand. which was really great because i was out of tampons and you can't get those with food stamps.

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