Why I Hate Dane Cook

I am one of the few people on this planet who thought Dane Cook was funny. I watched his stand-up on HBO, Comedy Central and youtube. I also thought he was very sexy and sat through every vapid movie  he made. He has a hot body, I'm not denying that. I imagined he would be a cool person to befriend, one you could hang out with and nod in sympathy at his bad girlfriend stories. Maybe he would escort you somewhere if you asked him nicely.

So I decided to follow him on Twitter. I find his verified listing, click follow and get this message...

You have been blocked from following this account at the request of the user.

He doesn't know me. Out of over 3 million followers I have been blocked. I don't know if he's gotten me confused with someone else or I won a "Get Cock-Blocked by Dane Cook" contest I don't remember entering.

I've never done anything to him. Maybe he would accept me as a follower if I sent him a picture of my tits- or maybe that will make him go blind.

He went to the trouble to block me, or at least one of his handlers decided to- who knows. Maybe he had a dream that he should block me or danger would befall him- like a sub-plot of a Final Destination movie.

Someone took the time to block me from his account for some unknown reason.

I guess I should be flattered.

I think this is how stalkers get started.

Note that Dane Cook isn't doing anything to get the monkey away from his ear.

If you aren't old enough to get the significance of the above picture I posted of him, Google Richard Pryor, monkey and Q-tip.

Now you know why I hate Dane Cook.

I hate him almost as much as I hate Dell Computer Company. I would say they both suck equally.