Another Me

I have another screen name I use as my email address for junk mail. It's an AOL name I've had since 1994.

I did a search today on this screen name- I saw someone on FB who had their identity used in nefarious ways. Guess what?

People using my AOL name- which is a nickname I've had since I was in second grade in 1972- include:

• a lesbian on Pinterest who pins pics of naked women
• a social reject who has profiles on every dating sight
• a woman in Russia willing to be your bride for the right price
• an astrologer
• a very high-scoring World of Warcraft player

and a few other things.

I have no recourse here. It's not my real name anyway. It's just very pissifiying and maddening. No wonder several people- Hollywood celebrities, mind you- have blocked me on Twitter. People I have never had any interaction with, never met, never sent an email. I just admired their work. But I'm blocked because I used my nickname, which is very unusual.

I hate to do it but I will have to come up with a new nickname. I am so infuriated.

The Happiest Place on Earth

It's that time of year again. Everyone is gearing up for summer vacations: the long lost relatives, the beach, Disneyland.

But not me.

I don't care about going away. I have nothing to escape from. My son and his family want to go to Crater of Diamonds State Park. My grandson- 10 years old, by the way- has collected a box full of stuff to use while he digs for diamonds.

I don't want to go. I like staying at home. Maybe because I spent my first 3 years traveling around the country. Not in a cool hippie VW bus, but in an old raggedy pick-up truck with a camper on the truck bed We used to park at stores after they closed, to spend the night and use stolen electricity to cook dinner in the electric skillet. My mom was on her third husband. Family rumor has it, after they ditched me at my great-grandparent's house, they ran a scam where my mom would pick up a man in a bar and take him back to a hotel where my step-father would bust in and steal their wallets. i don't doubt it.

But anyway, I like staying home. I'd rather cook at home than spend a fortune on restaurant food. I'd rather sleep in my own bed with my other pillows instead of paying for a hotel room. I don't need souvenirs.

There's no place like home.

Stupid People Should Step Away From The Internet

Something stupid happened on FB today. I wouldn't mention it because it makes me sound vengeful and petty but it is a prime example of why stupid people should not be allowed to use the internet and should be restricted to using crayons and old newspaper to force their misconceptions on the world.

I belonged to a fan page for a cult classic TV show. This show featured a lot of cooking, but they were all fake recipes. All except one.

Someone in the group posted they were looking for some of these fake recipes. I Googled the only really recipe for something served on this show during it's 7+ year run. I found a book review for a book about the show and it happened to include a PDF of  this recipe. I've actually cooked it before and it's a good recipe, just a bit time consuming. I posted the link to this book, and thereby the recipe.

I came back 3 hours later and saw my link had been removed and there were 16 posts about how I was committing copyright fraud. Mind you, this is a book review that has been on the Internet for years! A few people tried to take my side but it didn't do any good. The admin felt I was cheating this actor out of book royalties. She even removed the Amazon link someone else posted for the book which didn't even have the recipe but offered the book at a substantial discount- like over 20%!

She put up a link to this book directly to the publisher for full cover price. Does anyone actually ever pay the cover price any more since Amazon permeated the online ordering market? She claimed she called the publisher and this was the only link the publisher approved of posting. I call bullshit!

She is a fucking idiot.

I wrote my little rant and she kind of apologized, but not really. Later I saw she had removed all traces of the exchanges. The original shit stirrer posted separately, explaining she demanded the link be removed out of respect for the actor. Fuck both of them!

People, if you want information, Google is your friend.

Here is the link: Emergency! TV Series: Marco's Chili Recipe

Now do you see why I feel so silly? I just hate being told I am wrong when I am in the right.

Needless to say, I took myself out of the group.

Sidelines Part 2

Niece 2 refused to be brought back home. So the round trip of 22 hours on the road was for nothing. The traveling oxy caravan only spent 8 hours with here.

I did some FB stalking and the trip was the result of Niece 2 sending texts pleading with the family to help her, that she was being abused and had bruises and black eyes, not to mention in fear for her life and the safety of her unborn child. She wanted money to find her own place. Not surprisingly, I found pictures taken while they were down there and she is perfectly fine.She very pregnant and wearing a tank top and shorts-  a very skimpy outfit which bares a lot of skin- and there are no bruises, no black eyes, just her smoking with a bunch of tats. Smoking- and she has asthma, as does her son.

My sister and Niece 1 refused to listen to her pleas for money and took off in a tear to Texas to rescue her. Only to find out she was lying. My sister's status was "Thank God my baby is safe!"  I would have mentioned the fact she emotionally manipulated them while trying to gain financially.

In what world is it okay to treat family like this AND condone it? Not mine!

I am better off by myself than being part of their dysfunction. I just hate it cost me $1K and all faith in Niece 2 to find this out. I guess it was a cheap lesson.

Watching From the Sidelines

I loaned Niece 2 (who I helped raise) $1K, with the promise she would pay me back last year when she got her taxes. I got some BS about how her  taxes were short, could she pay me in installments. I agreed. She lied about sending me a $250 postal money order. I never got it. Then she tried herself up when she told me "the manager" said it was against "company policy" to give out info but it was tracked to Arkansas and then it was stolen and cashed. I've gotten money orders from the post office. They give you a slip and you track it at USPS.com. I told her I wouldn't be mad at her but to stop lying to me. She swears it was the truth. Then she started telling me she would send me money on Nov.15. Of course I got no money.

My sister(her mother) called me crying that my niece called her on Thanksgiving saying she only had mashed potatoes, green beans and sweet potatoes for Thanksgiving but she was grateful for that and couldn't my sister send her some money? My sister wanted to borrow some money to send her. So I told her about the $1K. Niece 2 got all her lying and scheming ways from my sister, so why my sister trusts her I will never know. I don't care if I ever see Niece 2 or any of her spawn again. She went from going to college to be a forensic scientist to having an unwed pregnancy. Then she dumped the guy and ran off with someone else to Texas. Her son was 1 at the end of March, and she is already 6 months pregnant with another by this other guy. She is a welfare queen.

I found out through FB my other niece- Niece 1 (who is just as big a disappointment but I didn't help raise) has driven to get her. 11 hours away. And my niece is on major amounts of oxycontin. Just like my sister. Neither of them is in any condition to drive. They never go anywhere alone, so I can only assume my sister and the niece are driving together to get her. I bet one gets buzzed while the other drives, then they switch, so the other one can get her buzz on. Niece 1 took her 3 kids with her. So we've got 3 minors and two impaired women flying down the highway in a minivan, high on oxycontin, going to get a heavily pregnant woman and a toddler to throw in the mix and drive back. They all smoke, so I imagine it's the Impaired Flying Ashtray.

Both nieces and all the kids have asthma. Yeah, it's a healthy environment.

I know I am better off not being included. But it hurts me to see how they turned out and I am the outcast. I do the right things and try to help Niece 2, only to have her lie to me and steal money from me.

A Wiccan friend sent me a spell to say every night like a prayer. Maybe I should start saying it:

As you sow, so shall you reap.
The money you took is not yours to keep.

Every night you'll feel the pain,
you've caused me by your ill-gotten gain.

Pay back the money and the spell I remove.
Keep it and your life will never improve.

It won't do anything, but it's supposed to make me feel better, i think. But I don't want her to have a bad life. Having my sister as a mother figure is bad enough. I just want her to pay me back and stop lying.

I wish I had family I could trust!

What Comes Around Goes Around

There was a girl in high school who shared a locker with this girl who hated me. So the first girl was pressured into hating me too. She would say mean things under her breathe at and about me. Then she went out with this guy I had an on again-off again relationship with, actually more off than on, I guess. He was one messed up dude, I see that now, but I was blinded by his long blonde hair and blue eyes and he could say what you wanted to hear. We did a lot of drinking and drugging together, and had lots of sex while we were impaired. I finally gave him up but we never confronted it head on. I just started avoiding his calls, if I answered the phone I would tell him I was busy and never call him back.He heard a rumor I was getting married and the night I got married, he drove by my now-husband's house a hundred times. Now it would be called stalking.

He kept calling me after I got married and he still drove by the house. I got off work at 11:00 at night and he got off at midnight. I could count on hearing his Volkswagon Bug putt-putting past the house at 15 minutes after midnight.

He finally moved away, but I still got weird phone calls at all hours of the night, just weird breathing, like he was jacking off. Later I worked for a national hotel chain and I worked 5 a.m. until 1:30 p.m. I got these weird calls at work at 5:30, because I was the only one answering the phone for the whole country until 6:00. One day I said "Stop, Mike. No one loves you." The calls at work and at home stopped that day. I realized later one of my husband's friends had to have told him my shift changed.

Back to this girl. She was a real cunt to me. I was glad at the end of the school year, because my mother moved and I went to a different school than she did. I didn't hear from her until Facebook came along. She saw we had been to the same school and sent me a friend request. I accepted it and didn't tell her who I really was, as my FB name is the nickname I had in second grade.

I did finally come out to her and gave her enough info to figure out who I was. I told her that she had been very mean to me but I understood it was the influence the other girl she shared her locker with (and this chick's sister who also went out with the weirdo Mike) and I didn't hold it against her. She told me her first marriage fell apart and then she married this cute stoner guy who went to school with us. He was always smoking.He found out he had lung cancer and took his rifle outside one day and blew his head off in the backyard.

I feel sorry for her on one level. But another evil part of me thinks Karma smacked her upside the head. But this psycho Mike could be very persuasive. He spread a lot of rumors about me. I always came running back. It's pretty sad to think that he was able to manipulate me and make me feel bad about what he did, even 35 years later. He is the one I stalked down on FB that I talked about on her a few years ago. His blonde hair is gone- he's bald, he has bags under his eyes and he's very fat- he looks like he's been eating nothing but donuts and butter. I'm 49 but people are shocked and think I am 35. His girlfriend is 55 but she looks 65. I think he got what he deserved.

So back to the girl. She posted in a group I belong to that she was having a hard time even 5 years after her husband's suicide. I feel sorry for her- no one needs that. There was one guy in the group giving her shit. Again, I think Karma raised its ugly head.

I'm torn, I told her I would give her a call one day when I get to town and we could go to lunch together. I might give her a call this week. She needs a friend right now. I can forgive her for being a bitch back then.

But I believe their is no redemption for Mike. He deserves whatever Karma dishes out to him.